Sunday 14 December 2008

This Is How It Ends: Transformers: The Headmasters



Phew! Finally got through all 35 episodes of Japan exclusive Transformers animation series: The Headmasters. Despite my earlier assurances, an overarching plot does begin to develop in the last third: new line headliner Mega Zarak has his heart set on blowing Earth up good. The Autobots are simply appalled at his vulgarity.

Here's a brief rundown. After the complete destruction of Cybertron - which Galvatron manages to survive, despite being at planet-tearing ground zero - the new toys faff about the Galaxy being boring. Galvatron eventually dies by falling off an iceberg, paving the way for Zarak's slowburn reign of terror. New characters are introduced every other week (mostly evil ones weirdly - Japan's notorious for slighting baddie toys), with formerly bee's knees cool characters regulated to bumbling idiocy. The Decepticons at least attempt to raise a smile by exterminating any race they happen upon, but throughout the middle chunk it's all deathly dull planet hopping. Ho hum! Thankfully the show goes Giant Robot Show trope mental in the final third; super weapons, counter super weapons, power of friendship conquering all: the works. Best of all is the sublimely ridiculous notion that Decepticon Ninja bastard Sixshot secretly has a heart of gold. Stranded on an asteroid with Movie brat Daniel, Sixshot decides to do a Piccolo, becoming bestest friends forever with the simpering tween. He's a professional see? This intergalactic war thing's just his day job!

By series end Sixshot is through with the backstabbing Decepticons, taking up a new role as Daniel's unseen lethal protector. Any bot who gives the child grief gets a right ninja thumping. This daffy turn of events is made even more excellent by the fact that Sixshot is easily the most psychotically capable Decepticon throughout the series.



He's a Decepticon's Decepticon if you will.

Sixshot's season wide crimes include: murdering two tiny child like friends of Chromedome for laughs; kidnapping and torturing kid friendly sidekick Wheelie; and most dastardly of all: killing the shit out of Autobot Earth commander Ultra Magnus! Remember him from The Movie? He got no Matrix of Leadership love. Sixshot bombards the unlucky Autobot with tons of laser fire until Magnus trips over all perished. Ouch! Sixshot does a cackle and flies off. In a series were all the other Decepticons end up all mouth and no trousers, Sixshot stands triumphant: no mouth, and absolutely loads of trousers thank you very much.

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