"Lag!"

With Call of Duty: Black Ops out this week, it's time to bid farewell to the crack compulsive time-sink that is Modern Warfare 2's multiplayer. Disaster Year has sunk umpteen days into this monster, climbing to the dizzy dizzy heights of a legitimate tenth prestige rank. Back slaps all round! Hit that milestone and you can expect obnoxious children to PM you night and day asking for free hack hook-ups. No dice child! You gotta earn this shit! I've run speed classes to stab you in your house, I've gotten hate mail for locking down bombsites with Danger Close M203 noob-tubes, and I've cowered my way back to 30 everytime I've cashed in and prestiged.

To see us out, here's a screamer reel from my favourite YouTube gameplay uploader Sandy Ravage, he of Booster Justice fame. He never sat in corners waiting for traffic, no sir. He rushed headlong into chokepoints firing Italian scatterguns wildly. So what if he was always host, and his chump foes never took out his air support? He's been an inspiration.